In the past I’ve had a lot of questions about the view of my parents when it came to the very big decisions in my life, especially the ones before I became 18. I’ve been asked on how supportive they are or how the situation came to light and they handled it.
The main thing in my life that my parents had to face obviously being the fact I left school early with no GCSEs. As any normal parents, education was everything to mine, my dad in particular. My mum was never really very strict but if my dad had his way i was at school everyday. So when year 11 started and everything got bad, i struggled on where to find the balance in pleasing my parents but not making myself and my mind unhappy. If anything i was planning on switching to a different school just to be able to keep that aspect ok. However when my parents realised just how unhappy i was and how bad it was truly making me they themselves said that if i wasn’t happy i was to remove myself completely because changing places wasn’t going to fix the situation only patch it until a later date. In that respect i was extremely lucky to have parents that recognised the situation i was at and freely asked me what i wanted to do instead of forcing me into something else. Which i am forever thankful for.
Travelling is a different situation however. At first my parents were fully supportive and told me to try to travel as much as I could but as time went on and it came to the point i was just buying tickets and not going through with travelling they naturally lost their temper, i mean rightfully in the money aspect of things it’s not practical. They never stopped encouraging me though they just asked me to put it on the back burner for a little while.
Counselling. As you all know if you’ve read back a few posts, I’ve been through counselling twice for my mental health to no help whatsoever, both times I was lucky enough to have supportive parents. My mum would walk with me to the appointments everyday and wait outside for an hour just to walk back with me and my dad would ask about it and act interested in all the information i would relay to him. The second time counselling happened they were as weary as i was, the state it put me in the first time wasn’t a happy place but trying again is always an option. When i told them i wanted to quit counselling they were more than happy to let me go through with my decision and didn’t really question it at all, in a way i think they understood after the first time.
Luckily i don’t think there has ever been a time where my parents haven’t been fully supportive of my past decisions, i mean obviously there are times where they get frustrated when i make progress and then get set back or there’s something I’m just not able to overcome, with frustration comes sadness. I think when mental illness was mentioned way back at the beginning they were so uneducated in it that they were learning along with me, maybe they went along with everything because they were scared and unsure on what way to approach the situation but in all honestly i feel they done everything and more i could ask of.
I often think of what if things were different. I know in myself that for my dad to allow me to give up my education it was a huge deal for him, but I know that personally if i had been made to stay in that sort of environment for much longer i would’ve grown up to hate my parents. A strong statement but it was making me so unhappy and mentally unwell. I know that if i wasn’t given free rein on being able to discover my travelling and overcoming that on my own then i would’ve blamed them, in any way i felt like i could get away with blaming them. If anything it made our relationship a hell of a lot stronger as i feel like without them i wouldn’t have improved as much as i have lately.
I am also more than aware that some people are sadly not as lucky as i am so i personally take my situation in the best way. I just feel sad that some people aren’t able to have that support there to help them grow because it’s honestly the best way to improve yourself and your mind.
Have a good day