UK Statistics

As someone who suffers with several mental illnesses i feel wounded when i see someone talk about it in such a lighthearted way, as if its treated perfectly fine and we get everything we need to progress within ourselves. It makes me feel as though we arent being taken serious enough nor are we really being as much of a statement as physical injuries. I feel as though if mental health was taught in schools and the audience of understanding was made wider then there will be alot more understanding about it. So i decided to do a different post today, a more informative one. Did you know?

  • Among teenagers the rates of depression and anxiety have increased by 70% over the last 25 years
  • The number of children and young people who have been sent to A and E with a psychiatric condition has more then doubled since 2009? The last recorded number being in 2014 which topped at almost 18 thousand people.
  • Childline released statistics in late 2014 showing that in that year alone they held 35 thousand counselling sessions with children who talked about suicide which is a 116% increase since 2011.
  • 1 in 4 people will experience a mental health problem each year the main ones being mixed anxiety and depression, anxiety, depression, OCD, post traumatic stress disorder, eating disorders, phobias and panic disorder.
  • The UK invests £115 million per year on mental health research,which may i add is decreasing massively every year, Mental health receives 5.5% of the UK health research money. This meaning there is a mere budget of £9.95 spent on each individual person affected by mental health problems which has probably decreased since the last statistics were released.
  • In the year changing from 2014 to 2015 the number of people getting in touch with mental health and disability services hit a high at nearly 2 million.
  • The mental health act was used nearly 60,000 times in 2014/15 to detain people which was shown as the highest ever increase at 10%
  • in 2014/15 there was near 4,000 inpatient admissions under the child and adolescent psychiatry speciality, half of which were noted down as an emergency.

I would like to add that not only could this be inaccurate since as it was last updated there has probably been a large increase in the numbers but we also have to take in mind those people who suffer in the dark, who are either too frightened to come forward about it or those people who are turned away. I am aware that a doctor having a list and symptoms is a way of knuckling down on the amount of people they admit to help what with low funding but i feel as though its downright wrong that you have to fit a certain criteria and get to a certain level of dangerous before they offer you the help you may be entitled too. I feel as though it should be treated in the same respect as a physical injury. Get a solution or help before it gets worse and somewhat incurable.

If you are reading this and are one of those people that go around posting funny things about mental health or you do those chain posts or especially people who will say they are depressed because they didn’t get what they wanted or they have chronic anxiety because they were momentarily nervous about something they needed to do. Please please please take us into consideration, we are not taken seriously as it is, nor are we given the correct equipment to help us get anywhere near where we need to be. I know to you it may seem as though its silly but to us its something we are extremely passionate about, something that effects us constantly and to be put in a category that is made fun out of constantly or used as the punch line of a joke is degrading to what we are trying to achieve.

Search the web, read a book, become more informed about mental health and inform others, it can go a long way.

Have a good day

Sky x

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Should children be made to do presentations in class?

As some of you are aware my posts have taken a turn into the education part of things lately. This mainly being because as i am turning 20 im not looking into doing anymore education. I mean i wouldn’t say never because one day i might want to re look into some sort of education if i become interested in taking a particular path but right now i have no need or want to go into anymore education. This made me think about all the things i find somewhat wrong with the education system. Now i am in no way saying it is the same for every single person and every single school because obviously i have no idea whether that could be the case as i am only one person experiencing it at one school.

However i realised that when you hit, mainly year 9 sometimes before, you are made to partake in a Speaking and Listening controlled assessment. If you’re not sure what this is, its basically where you are given a topic to go and revise to then give a presentation about in front of your class. You are then graded on how you give your presentation before being graded on how well you are listening to other peoples presentations. The listening part is as easy as it sounds. You turn up to class, sit there and look in any direction and the teacher doesn’t really bat an eyelid towards it.

The speaking part is a whole different story. With my very first speaking and listening presentation i was in year 9. I had told the teacher about my situation and how i felt extremely uncomfortable and somewhat sick to present to the front of the class and i even offered to come in my spare time to the staff room and present it to the teachers. It was easier for me that way, i was able to cope. Instead of guiding me along and helping me find a situation that suited not only my comfort but also gave the teacher what she wanted, i was made and forced into a situation that i could only describe as hell. I was told if i didn’t complete the speaking and listening presentation in front of everyone then she was going to fail me on not only the speaking part but the listening part aswell. Not only that but she made me believe this was a big chunk towards my final grade. As a year 9 student this is something you dont want to mess up. It being the year you were out to impress and hopefully set up for your future GCSE classes.

I wish i could say i was one of those people who found it nervous but eventually got over it and faced my fear but i wasn’t. What the teacher failed to see that day was that granted you get nervous when doing a presentation, nerves is a normal thing but when you’re panicking, having days off because of the fear, losing sleep and crying your eyes out thats when the teacher needs to reevaluate the situation to suit both of your needs.

I do think if you’re in a school then you should have to do everything everyone else does, maybe at different levels and different ways but you are still able to do everything. So i do think we should do speaking and listening presentations, i just think we should do them in a different way.

I can present in front of my friends fine. I can present in front of teachers fine. I cant present in front of an entire class that mostly hate me with the thought on my mind that if i do something out of line it will stick with me forever. I cant present and have 30 sets of eyes of people i feel uncomfortable around in an everyday situation staring back at me just waiting for me to mess up and quite frankly when you have popular people in your class its never really ever comfortable even walking into the room.

I feel as though people with mental health are expected to show it constantly and constantly have to prove to people that they really do have it and it sickens me. It sickens me that in year 9 i was never taken seriously and made to do something that made me make myself physically sick and it sickens me that it probably is still going on today. I personally dont understand what makes it different between presenting in front of your class and presenting in front of a couple of friends. They are judging you on your presenting, the way you handle yourself and how you get the information across and that should be the main thing.

If they feel comfortable doing presentations or they’re just a little nervous then im all for giving them a little nudge but if you constantly give someone a nudge and are aware of how uncomfortable it makes them then stop. I don’t understand why anyone who is aware of how physically draining it is for a person is able to just keep pushing them until it effects their health in such a way they’re unable to even think of going into school

Education is important, yes but your health mentally and physically is a hell of alot more important then your education. Dont let someone tell you it isn’t.

Have a good day

Sky x

Anxiety around Children…

Before i get in depth about this blog post i would like to just note here that i am in no way a parent, not legally or biologically. I am an auntie, i mean im sure if you speak to some of my family members they may disagree on that matter but thats a whole load of drama for another time, this blog post is simply the things i experience with my anxiety whilst my nieces are in my care.

For as long as i can remember i have been a very big part of my eldest nieces life. Her coming to stay at our house from a very young age meant mine are her bond grew to be something quite special. As she was growing up obviously you have the initial panicking everyone has when theres a baby around. Constantly checking if shes breathing when she seemed to sleep even a couple minutes longer, the fear of her putting something dangerous in her mouth or simply just the standard fear of her bumping her head when she finally got into the stages of exploring and my god Olivia has done it all.

When Olivia-May was first born i was so anxious to hold her or even pick her up as i never really knew how you was correctly meant to hold a baby and right until i knew she was able to hold her own head up i tried to avoid it, unless that is however someone passed her to me  and i was sitting down. I like to think I’ve become less anxious when holding babies as when my second niece Ellie came along i picked her up and carried her around no problem and she was ALOT smaller then Olivia.

Another thing that caused me to nearly call an ambulance quite often is the eye rolling, and again bare in mind i had no experience with or around children prior to my nieces. Its something that im still not able to handle. I have been told that babies when they’re first born dont have particularly good control of their eyes so some may roll alot where others may be pretty relaxed so i do understand the concept of it but for me personally i panic every time.

Even noises or funny movements. For example my eldest niece Olivia-May who will be 4 in August has this new thing where if shes excited, annoyed or just angry shes shake her body in a fit like manner and it PETRIFIES me. Im unsure where she suddenly picked it up from but as an adult its something i wish she never. I mean granted im happy in the sense there is nothing wrong when she does do it but my mind goes crazy and every time im petrified that its not her doing it and there is something wrong but at that age they eventually grow out of things and this is one of those things im hoping she grows out of soon.

With my eldest niece Olivia we didn’t really have that big a problem with her putting small objects in her mouth as she was quite attached to her dummy so she never really put anything that was dangerous in her mouth, that i can recall anyway but my youngest niece doesn’t have a dummy, never has and doesn’t really give them the time of day which means at any given advantage she will put ANYTHING in her mouth. Like you know when you’re sitting playing bricks after dinner and she picks something up and puts it in her mouth, i have that panic every time until its either out her mouth or we realise its nothing but abit of dinner shes dropped. Trust me that kid can eat.

Reading through these i like to think they’re quite normal things to be anxious about around children and they are. I mean i do have the odd moment when i become anxious thinking about what situation might be unfolding but thats not talk for such a public writing platform.

So all in all i dont think i get anymore anxious then a normal person around children, if im honest i feel like im alot more relaxed in the sense they dont take anything seriously, you can never do wrong in a kids eye and you never have any expectations from them to do anything, i mean i do spoil them both quite alot but i dont feel like i have to constantly be on edge around them in the way i would be in an adult situation. If anything they help my anxiety which is probably a good thing with the amount of time i spend looking after them. In all honesty it could become completely different the day i become a mother to my own kids and i could look back on this blog post wishing it was all this easy but that isn’t for at least another couple of years so for now i think i can rest a little.

Have a good day

Sky x

Does my anxiety effect my eating?

I frequently get asked the question on whether my anxiety effects my eating in anyway and if im honest with you all I’ve never really thought about how and what i eat in depth as its almost become a routine for me. So I thought for this blog post i would describe what my eating is like on my bad and good anxiety days and whether i feel anxious about certain types of food and how i go about them.

If im honest with you i dont eat very many full meals. I remember being able to go to school and pig out constantly then coming home just to eat even more. Since i left school and my anxiety got bad i dont go near new foods, if i wasn’t used to it before then i wont try it. Its almost like a fear inside me that stops me from eating anything out of my comfort zone whether that be sweets or just a simple sauce to put on top of my chips. Even if im used to the food if it looks gross i wont eat it for the fear theres something wrong with it.

For the past couple of months all i have eaten for dinner is microwave pizzas, you know those Chicago town ones that you put in the microwave for 3 and a half minutes. I will rarely go out of that and when i do it will simply be a roast or a small takeaway I’ve been getting since i can remember even then i wont eat it all. I dont have breakfast, ever. Im just not hungry when i first wake up, if anything i feel sick with anxiety with what the day could bring and when i do finally get hungry its at least 2 in the afternoon and then theres no point in having anything to eat until my pizzas.

I remember a couple of weeks back i had a terrible week, my anxiety was sky high and all i ate was 2 microwave pizzas and a banana for 4 days, i mean granted i downed at least 3 litres of coke but other then that i felt too sick and scared to eat. Often however i will snack throughout the day on a bag of sweets. Even then they have to be very specific sweets, i wont touch those sweets that leave a weird smell on your hand in fear of what they have in them.

I do go out to eat. Mcdonalds and sometimes jennys. I wont go anywhere else, i like feeling comfortable and those places make me feel like that and im not sure if thats because i have the same thing every time i go there so im used to it now or what. I mean granted it completely over looks my fear of whats in foods but for some reason i feel ok with these places, probably the stupidest thing ever said but it makes sense to me.

I eat very little, i am aware of that but its how i am. I do however drink alot. I have at least 4 hot drinks in the day and i constantly have cans or bottles of coke laying near me that i drink throughout the day so i suppose in some way you can say im replacing my food with litres of coke.  I have been told constantly by my counselors that the caffeine in coke is what makes my anxiety worse then it probably would be and i did make myself not drink it for weeks but i became so weak that i went straight back to drinking it.

Apart from all that ive mentioned before this i feel as though im pretty normal with food. Granted on my really anxious days i dont eat but then would you if you constantly felt on edge and like you was going to throw up if you hadn’t already?

Now i am in no way saying that 100% my bad eating is linked to my anxiety in anyway i am simply putting out there what my eating is like on good and bad days and answering a question i was asked. However I do feel as though on my bad days my anxiety effects my eating but i also think its different for every person. It could not effect some peoples eating habits or it could effect them massively, its all down to the individual.

Have a good day

Sky x

Life Update….

I feel in this blog post i should start off by apologising for the sudden stop in blogmas. My life suddenly got extremely busy and my parents haven’t been in the best of health meaning i haven’t really had the time to sit down and write a blog post to the standard i would like to achieve before uploading it. I must admit however that i did do far better then i ever thought i could do, always a plus.

After finally getting the time to sit down and write a post i suddenly found myself stuck on what to write about, so having so many things happening in my life lately and writing about it seemed like the right thing to do. I mean im not really 100% sure where i should start but somewhere at the beginning sounds reasonable.

Since my last blog post that was somewhat life related my families been hit with many troubles, some obviously not being wrote about as we are keeping it all very personal but long story short my dads not much better. In fact hes alot worse. Over this past month we have just seen such a fall in his already bad health its worrying. Sadly we have to wait until January for results on this situation so until then all we can do is pray.

These last couple of months i promised myself i would focus on my anxiety and ways that are good to me to beat certain issues. I could sit here and write fake scenarios but quite frankly it hasn’t happened. If anything my anxiety and depression are becoming worse. Silly things like someone putting a whole sweet in their mouth turns me into a panicking mess when usually i can ignore it, i can focus my mind on other things but thats not the case anymore. This leads me to more problems because where do i go from here? Granted theres a way out somewhere like im always being told but i feel like ive searched it for so long that now im coming upto 20 years old its becoming desperate.

I always imagined by 20 that i would have my life together and at least have some sort of thought about my future. My goal being to be settled and happy enough to have kids by at least 25. I now know how impossible that is. Its scary because i get hit with things all the time but my mind rejects opportunities, it rejects people and no one really understands it to the point they carry on until they know my mind can come round, it scares them off instead. It leads to me almost hiding in myself as i know just what will happen, like the many times it has before. I want to sit here and say by the end of 2017 i will be writing a post about how together my life has become in the last year but im finding that tricky to imagine when im not the sort of person to go chasing after things and im certain not special enough for people to come chasing after me.

Leaving this blog post on a positive note however, 2 days till Christmas!!!

Have a good day

Sky x

20 Blogmas ideas….

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As this year is my first year doing Blogmas i didn’t quite realise the struggle it would be to do a post everyday and be able to come up with good content. With my blog specifically being around my mental health and my general life it made it extremely difficult to think of ideas especially when i didn’t want to trail too much off the subject that my blog is about. My first thought when i decided to get involved was that i could do several blog posts in advance then i wouldn’t be struggling so much as i could always keep one blog post ahead of myself, this hasn’t happened. In fact I’ve struggled to even manage to write blog posts what with being so poorly, somehow however ive managed it so far.

I’ve been lucky that i had enough posts to make up the first few days so i could properly relax and help myself recover but they soon went down and i found myself stuck. I had no energy and absolutely nothing to write about. I hadn’t brought anything nor had i done any activities that i could share with you all. This made me think of this post. Im aware this post is going around quite alot but i have never seen a post where the things i could be interested in writing about are in one place so i decided to do my own. Here are 20 ideas you could use for your blog this December:

  • Festive Haul
  • Past Christmases
  • Letter to Santa
  • Recipe for your favourite Christmas treat
  • Decorating for Christmas
  • Charity at Christmas time
  • Guide to saving for Christmas
  • Christmas Day look
  • Whats on your Christmas list
  • A day in the life
  • Product reviews
  • Holiday crafts tutorial
  • Stocking stuffers ideas
  • Make your own Christmas decorations
  • Christmas Playlist
  • Must have advent calendars
  • Festive makeup looks
  • Christmas tag
  • Christmas day Haul
  • Top buys under £20

I hope they help some of you in finding more ideas for this festive time of year!

Dont forget to follow my blog as every day up until Christmas i will be posting a blog post!! 

Have a good day

Sky x

 BLOGMAS LINKS.

December 1st: 24 Days Leading Up To Christmas

December 2nd: Giving At Christmas

December 3rd: Santa Claus was in my living room?

December 4th: Anxiety at Christmas…

December 5th: Christmas Decorating…

December 6th: My favourite Christmas treat…

December 7th: Christmas over the years….

Final counselling decision….

I felt as though i needed to finish my counselling blog posts in a way that explains my way of thinking and everything that was involved in the final decision.

I am not going back to counselling.

The last time i went for a session i felt somewhat put down and made to feel that everything was down to me being an attention seeker or a drama queen. I felt hurt and it pushed my confidence down to the lowest level it has ever been and with everything going on in my personal life at the moment i felt like it wasn’t giving me the release from my thoughts that i was promised.

The first time i went counselling i put it down to my expectations being too high and me going by what i had seen on TV and read about in books so even though i didn’t really want to i gave it a second go and went back with no expectations other than to be treated with respect. Now not only did i get put down for keeping a blog about my progress and experiences in life i was also made to feel like i was lazy. Therefore i came to the decision to not go back to counselling.

Now when i say i will not go back to counselling im not ruling getting help out im simply ruling out the counselling people i was with. As i said in previous posts im unsure whether the woman had something against me personally or she just had a bad day every day i went in but when i put myself in a mindset to do counselling i expect even the tiniest bit of  a positive outcome. Im aware that doesn’t come straight away and you have to work for it but to be put down to a degree you become even more secluded then what you are is ridiculous. As i have many resources now i am currently going down the self help route and searching through every option available to me in the hopes of living somewhat a normal life.

I will write my blog posts whilst im going through a self help journey as even though i have posted some pointers on it in the past i have never fully experienced it and i feel as though thats a completely different situation then just reading and being informed on the subject. Im aware this route is probably going to be harder as i am completely on my own with no professional help but in the long run it might help me more than someone else could and if not i have many paths to look down on what could help me in the future.

I feel like ive hit a stump these past years when ive been relying on someone else to give me the answers to my questions when in fact the whole time i needed to be asking myself these questions because granted i probably wont know the answer straight away but i’ll learn like the same with everything in life, you learn from experience. This just may be many more bad experiences then good.

Have a good day

Sky x

Follow me and check back on the 1st December for a blog post every day right up until Christmas!